When you do busy work, say dish washing, thoughts dawn on you: I think it's sad that I haven't met anyone who loved me, not just parts of me. It's even sadder when you're turning 30. I've spent all this time on this planet and I've got nothing to show for. I'm not asking for a marriage; just a great relationship, that great love. Just so in love, truly, deeply, madly... Anything that resembled a little bit of that was probably in high school. It was hard to articulate the feelings but what else can motivate a guy to write so many pages of lovely letters, and a girl to talk to him on the phone forever? It was pure and innocent; and it will never ever be like that again. You'd be doing yourself a favor by telling him, "I don't believe you." Cuz there's no reason to trust him -- at all. Nobody tied you to him, you tied yourself to him, girlie. You tied yourself to guys who just didn't love you.
So 20 more years until I croak. Let's just throw myself at building me a sand castle. Shall we?
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